Living Happily in a Clusterfuck – Part 2: How Do You Stay Strong in Times of Crisis?

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In the first part, we looked at the topics of acceptance (1.), togetherness (2.), letting go (3.), loss (4.) and burnout (5.). And, of course, an introduction to the overarching theme: a world that is increasingly falling apart, to the extent that the usual mechanisms for overcoming temporary crises will no longer suffice. I shall refrain from a detailed preface at this point. Instead, let’s look at further areas of life in which we can prepare ourselves emotionally and mentally for what lies ahead – here we go!

6. Flexibility

A crisis – whether acute or long-term – is characterised not least by the fact that it differs noticeably from the ‘normal’ situation. For instance, we all sleep in our beds every night, whilst a house fire represents an (acute) crisis that wakes us up and drives us out of bed and onto the street. Apart from a house fire, it would be absurd to run out onto the street in your pyjamas and ask passers-by to ring the fire brigade. Incidentally, it would actually be illegal for a passer-by to kick down the door of your house or flat, burst into your bedroom and drag you – by force if necessary – out onto that very same street. But if the house in which you are still asleep is on fire, anything else would constitute a failure to render assistance.

So we can see that the rules change in a crisis situation – and they do so from one moment to the next. Anyone who rigidly clings to the behaviour they have learnt in a normal situation will be unable to help either themselves or others in a crisis. In our nationwide political crisis, the SPD leadership is a prime example of this deadly rigidity: As the junior partner to Merkel’s CDU, they could still afford appeasement, compromises and the impact of a slug – after all, there was still a certain degree of common sense there, which is completely lacking in Merz’s CDU. Well, flexibility is important, but how can one learn it?

In fact, it is advisable to expose yourself to unfamiliar situations as often and as intensively as possible. Overcoming your own embarrassment at karaoke; relying on chance rather than a planned trip; the pattern of the children’s game ‘Opposites Day’… are useful gateways into the world of flexibility. Question your own rules and whether they are still relevant today. Take care, for example, not to structure your activism according to the motto ‘What do I like?’, but to follow the motto ‘What is efficient?’.

Habit, in particular, is poison for mental flexibility, which in turn forms the basis for flexibility of action. Map out your daily behaviour, analyse the recurring patterns – and break them. Risks are an important part of this journey; they build a vital bridge to resilience: Dangers are what lie ahead for us in the coming years and decades. The more practised you are in assessing and dealing with dangers, the better it will be for you and for all those you wish to protect. Flexibility is a vital foundation for this.

7. Body awareness

Our bodies aren’t just there to carry clothes and luggage across the countryside, to play sport, to sweat in the sauna or to post a perfected image on Instagram. Above all, they aren’t there for us to be ashamed of them or even to have to justify them. Contrary to some lofty notions of a spiritualised Homo rationalis, our bodies are not tools – we are our bodies.

Even the central nervous system, which contains all our thoughts, emotions, character traits and memories, is part of the body. Strictly speaking, those thoughts, emotions, character traits and memories are ‘merely’ reflections of physical processes taking place in the central nervous system (and, to some extent, in the peripheral nervous system). Our organs and musculoskeletal system, which are often referred to simply as the ‘body’, are simply further parts of our body.

It goes without saying that a cut is an unpleasant physical sensation. Yet fear and love also literally ‘go through the stomach’, whilst chronic stress often manifests as a tense neck and a feeling of love as a pleasant physical shiver. Thus, the body not only sends signals from outside the central nervous system (e.g. the cut), but states within the central nervous system – that is, our mental and emotional experiences – are also reflected in how we feel physically. So pay attention to your body’s signals.

Especially during quiet moments (e.g. whilst waiting), don’t distract yourself with your smartphone; instead, breathe calmly and tune into yourself and your body. The more practised you become at this, the easier it will be to connect with your body and the signals it sends you.

You don’t necessarily need professional training to learn how to deal with bodily signals. At the very least, make sure you don’t fall for quick fixes or constantly dismissive ‘everything’s fine’ approaches. Also, make sure you do not simply suppress the energy that can be contained in bodily signals (e.g. aggression) simply because it contradicts your moral compass (keyword: symptom displacement); instead, try to channel it as best you can.

Anger, for example, is channelled through sport; grief through unrestrained singing; and so on. What should not be forgotten is that, as human beings, we also interact with our bodies: gestures (which are worth observing in yourself and others), facial expressions (ditto), one-on-one competition in sport, partner dancing, sex and much more are all suitable ways of beneficially combining body awareness with physical interaction. Balance exercises, for example, offer a particularly simple yet effective way of accessing bodily awareness and the psyche.

8. Self-moralising

Morality always follows a set of moral rules. In principle, this is good and right, but rules also restrict our scope for action. Here – as with everything – it is the dose that makes the poison. The harsher our world becomes, the more immoral the attacks we feel exposed to become (the political parties know this all too well
).

To avoid suffering a crushing defeat in such a situation, one must adapt to it … and thus finds oneself in a dilemma. On the one hand, one does not want to be outdone; on the other, one does not want to become a malicious villain oneself. So what can one do to free oneself from this predicament?

‘There is no right life in the wrong one’ (Theodor W. Adorno) means that, in a problematic living environment, no one can attain moral perfection. A particularly vivid example is the story of Oskar Schindler, who kept his true moral compass hidden deep within himself whilst using charm and wit to talk the Nazis out of taking thousands of lives. This man must have developed a mischievous delight in his double-dealing; otherwise, he could not have sustained it over such a long period: the pleasure derived from the immoral (partying with fascists) served a moral purpose.

Of course, we are not Oskar Schindler, yet this example illustrates very well that a desperate clinging to moral perfection is not only an exhausting self-deception, but also harbours a great weakness: mental rigidity. Schindler’s moral compass was strong; which is why he was able to ‘loosen up’ when the situation demanded it and use this ‘moral flexibility’ for the greater good.

Now, it is important to note that we are not talking here about full-blown fascists like Amon Göth, but about people who, for example, drive an SUV or reject gender-neutral language. Nothing particularly dramatic, then, but rather the minor immoralities of everyday life. Anyone who views such people through the magnifying glass of hypermorality also magnifies their malice and quickly feels surrounded by a hostile world.

From there, it’s not far to paranoia, where the world is divided into good and evil. Shades of grey are barely noticed, whilst one becomes increasingly detached from reality. It goes without saying that contentment falls by the wayside in the process. Yet, holed up in the stronghold of moral hypersensitivity, one not only rejects hardline Nazis and die-hard fascists, but also loses touch with society at large: with people who might still be able to lend a helping hand in the midst of the clusterfuck.

9. Rituals

A life without rituals is simply unthinkable for human beings, even if we hardly notice it in our day-to-day lives. Anyone who, for example, feels the energising effect of a sip of coffee immediately is actually experiencing the workings of a learned ritual: Caffeine doesn’t take effect within seconds, but at the earliest ten minutes after consumption. Bedtime rituals lie at the opposite end of the spectrum to our current mental state, as they wind down the nervous system and help us fall asleep.

In between, we ‘knock on wood’, wish people a happy birthday, raise a glass to the deceased, share our political concerns via social media posts, and much more. And just like that, we have moved from personal rituals through shared rituals to social rituals. If we now wish to define the concept of a ritual, we might choose the following words:

A behaviour governed by set procedures which, through the process of experience, achieves a tangible/measurable effect.

A ritual may be recurring (e.g. morning coffee) or one-off (e.g. a eulogy), and its effect may be both mental and physical (the basic level of autogenic training involves both). What makes rituals so special is not only the breadth and depth of their effect, but also the fact that this effect can be specifically controlled: a bedtime ritual makes one tired, a handshake creates a connection, singing together gives courage, and so on. Ritual behaviour is so deeply ingrained in our evolutionary history that it can even be observed in great apes. So much for Homo rationalis!

The structure of rituals follows what Arnold van Gennep termed the ‘rite of passage’. He divides rituals into three phases: separation from normal everyday life (entering into the ritual), the ritual itself (its core phase, where the effect takes place) and the return to everyday life (the desired change is now part of the new everyday life). In this sense, a ritual can, for example, transform fear into courage, whereby in a world of utter chaos, it is advantageous for courage rather than fear to become integrated into everyday life.

Since the core phase of rituals addresses the unconscious, symbolism plays a major role. From religion, occultism and esotericism, through cultural practices, to one’s favourite coffee mug in the morning, rituals are inconceivable without symbolism. The conscious mind, by contrast, is vanishingly small and merely the final step in a long chain of reactions within our nervous system. Rituals are capable of navigating this chain of reactions precisely and effectively from start to finish – make use of them!

What’s still missing

I think we now have a good, if somewhat incomplete, overview. I would have liked to have written a little more about the practical applications of trance states. Camouflage within restrictive systems is also likely to become important for all of us – one shudders to think of the upcoming election in Saxony-Anhalt. But time and space are finite, so in the third and final part of this series I intend to focus on specific methodologies (e.g. the stress tolerance window). Until then, I wish you a pleasant, relaxed and, above all, joyful time!

Part 1: “Living contentedly in a clusterfuck – Part 1: How do you develop resilience in the face of crisis?”

Dominic Memmel, born in Würzburg in 1980 and based in Leipzig since 2014, works as an activist, communications consultant and podcaster. Visit the author’s page.